Called back into suffering.
"But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength...." Isaiah 40
"Mom called 911 and I honestly prayed that the Lord would take me right then and there."
I'm about to do something I've never done before.
CAUTION: This post is not about self care. [[You've been warned]].
...today I want to address the fact that we are indeed human. The dishes get stacked high sometimes. The laundry piles up. You're a little behind on paperwork, and you haven't given your budget a good look in a while. And you're getting bogged down by fatigue and stress. The amount of time it takes for you get to that point is totally unique to you. For me, it's about 3-4 weeks until I need a reset day.
Can I ask you a quick question? Are you exactly where you want to be in every area of your life? Are you a beast at fitness, maintaining a stellar GPA, or running an extremely successful business, all the while thriving in your relationships and maintaining a perfect budget that will get you out of debt in 18 months?
No? I'm not surprised. In case you haven't heard, no one is perfect. But with the right mind set and the will to act, I promise you can improve one cycle at a time.
I probably looked like a deer in the headlights when I dropped my scrubber and sat down at the table where my journal and Bible were laying. I slowly opened my journal and wrote down everything that was flooding my brain. I had to fight this off. It was time for battle whether I was ready or not.
On October 19th, 2014, I let go of my dream to become a nurse. I had been fighting with my dysfunctional brain for too long. Everything was a blur, and not just because of my tears. I hadn't been able to think straight in months. The day previous, I ran into the road, scared and afraid, not knowing where I was. I was tortured everyday by confusion, even though I was fighting to keep everything straight in my mind. It was to no avail, and I inevitably crumbled.